Amel Karboul

Part 4: Love-Hate Relationship

The relationship of Arab countries and society with the West is ambiguous. It has even been called a love-hate relationship.

Why hate?

Historically, countries in the West were colonial powers that oppressed national movements for independence. During the colonial period they supported passivity and inferiority among Arab people. But some of the hatred is more legendary, dating back to the Crusades and the period when the Arabs had to leave Andalusia due to the Reconquista. Some of the reasons for today’s antagonism and hate towards the West, frequently cited in the Arab world, include:

• The West’s unconditional support for Israel, its occupation policy and the war in Iraq.
• Western countries and policies are hypocritical. On the one hand western politics declare freedom and democracy as fundamental values, while on the other they support autocratic regimes outside their countries and have used their secret services to destroy democratic forces that were not following their interests.
• The West and their allies have abused many innocent people who lost their dignity or life in the name of democracy, human rights and the fight against terrorism.
• Trade policies, imposed duties and monetary fund policies have increased poverty in many Arab countries. Agricultural and other subsidised western products have massively gained market shares and destroyed local employment and industry.

It is important to note that the perceived imperialism of the West is not limited to Arabs. I have often found this same antagonism in India, sub-Saharan Africa or South America.

Why love?

Arabs are fascinated by western technology and progress. Researchers and scholars cite western studies. Being educated in the West gives young people a competitive advantage – doctors and pharmacists advertise that they have studied in Paris or Boston as a guarantee of quality. Furthermore, Arabs who have visited or lived in western countries appreciate the freedom and advantages of democracy.

Sometimes this fascination is so acute that it becomes an inferiority complex: everything from Europe or the US is better than local products or services. This has given coaches and leadership trainers from the UK and the rest of Europe a huge competitive advantage. They are often hired on the basis of their nationality, without any quality check, which has led to many charlatans misusing the situation and damaging the coaching and training scene in numerous Arab countries.

Implications for coaching

• As a western coach you may start with the bonus of people’s fascination with you. You are considered a professional simply because you are from the US or Europe. You can also increase your bonus by showing honest respect and appreciation towards the Arab tradition, culture and history.
• The collectivist culture of the Arab world also works to your advantage. Since everybody knows everybody else, taking a local coach is perceived as risky. Employing a foreigner is a better guarantee of confidentiality. Talking about fear, shame or ‘non-Arab’ or ‘non-Islamic’ desires may be easier with an outsider than with a judgemental insider.
• On the other side, as a western coach you may be seen as a representative of imperialism. Feelings like anger and inferiority can be expected to be transferred to a western coach. It is important to help the client differentiate what feedback is directed to you as a coach and what comes to you as a representative of the US or Europe.
• Many people in the West, including coaches, have prejudices against Arabs and Muslims. They judge the behaviour of clients by western values and norms. Even I, with my Arab background – having been educated in the West and having worked there for a long time – struggle with my own stereotypical thinking. This is part of our human nature, and where education and self-awareness come in. An invaluable axiom to help all of us functioning in a global society was spoken by St Augustine in the fourth century: ‘Seek not to understand that you may believe, but believe that you may understand.’

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